I could be living.

Possible TW: ED
Hi everyone! I am so honored to write this for you, and I hope you find something helpful out of it. My name is Kristen Remidez and I have been in eating disorder recovery for almost a year. I have learned so many things and I would love to share a couple. Firstly, I would like to say that if you’re reading this and you have an eating disorder, you deserve to recover. You will not regret it in the end, and I know it might be hard to believe but life is better without your ED. Next, I would like to share some things about my recovery and my relationship with food. I struggled with anorexia for twoish years before getting help and starting recovery. I was very physically and mentally tired, hopeless, and isolated. My eating disorder had taken over my whole life. Everything I did was obsessive, restrictive, and controlled by something that wasn’t me. I spent years in denial that my relationship with food was not the slightest ‘normal’.

When my parents found out about my eating habits, they were very worried and first sought help from my pediatrician. They enforced a meal plan for me shortly after. There were many tears and long nights that followed. My first day on the meal plan was February 18th, 2021. On March 11th, I was admitted to a treatment center where I spent the next few months. There, I learned many lessons that will stay with me for the rest of my life. I learned that eating will always be my choice, but choices have consequences. I learned that my body needs energy that I get from food and learned a lot about nutrition. Finally, I learned how to accept myself and learned the coping skills I needed to be able to live a life without restrictions. All of this was extremely eye-opening as I had never come to the realization that I didn’t have to just be surviving.

I could be living. On July 19th, 2021, I was discharged from treatment and despite the fact that I had made incredible progress, I was still struggling. Over time, fighting my eating disorder has gotten much easier. I have been able to be open about my ups and downs and help others along the way. My values have defeated the values of anorexia and I am so glad. Food is fuel and so much more! I love being there for others but most importantly, I love being there for myself. Recovery is a form of self-care that I will master. Thank you for reading and I hope hearing my story was helpful to at least one person out there. I love each and every one of you and I care about you deeply.

Kristen <3